Something happened recently. If I could explain it in one word i’d call it “insanity”. But it’s not right to admit something like that to yourself, is it? One month ago everything was beautiful. I would drive around and look out the window and all the ugly waste of space and bone and think “everything is great. the world is amazing.” So, what happened? I think people call it love, but really what is love? Is it a different feeling than how I love my mom when I think i’m in love? There needs to be an in-between. there is no middle ground, or better yet, middle word between like and love and it’s bullshit. The first weeks the world couldn’t seem like a brighter, more beautiful place. and then the feeling hit. An empty pit in my stomach. Love? I don’t know. If this is love than it’s not what I want but I know its a feeling I only get when she’s around, when I think about her, when she text me, when she calls me. you get it. I woke up one morning and stepped outside to see the beautiful sunny day and admire the flowers out front of the sorority house next door like I do every morning. I looked at the flower pot that I could see from my porch. Blue, purple, white. Black tints around the edge. Normally i would step out and see these flowers and think about how today is beautiful. Not this time. As I’ve mentioned, something changed. “The flowers look like that from a grave site of a romantic suicide pact, A love that couldn’t make it, but couldn’t fall apart.” was my first thought. I immediately went back inside and locked my door. I smoked 2 more cigarettes and jumped in the shower to hopefully wash the thoughts out of my mind. I turn on the scolding hot water and step in. “I wonder if death feels this good?” What the fuck? Why is this in my mind? Why am I suddenly what seems to be the most miserable person i know? Its been over a week. This is still my thought process every day and I don’t know how to handle it.
LOOK AT HOW FUCKING HAPPY I LOOK.
This is what I did at work today.
Playing the Metro Times Blowout this year. 3/3 at Paychecks. 1:20 a.m. We are the last band of the festival.
Jam time @ Spur Studios.
LOTS OF THINGS COMING UP…
2.10.12
Mulligans
Grand Rapids, MI
W/ Circle Maybe
More info TBA
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2.11.12
Laughing Bear Longue
Newport, MI
W/ Pink Lighter B’hoys
Capual
Bailout
Snafu
8:00
$5
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2.24.12
Old Miama
Detroit, MI
W/ The Armed
Tharsis They
Snafu
8:00 P.M.
$5
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3.3.12
METRO TIMES BLOWOUT
Paychecks
Hamtramck, MI
W/ MANY AWESOME LOCALS
10:00 (We play at 1:20 a.m.)
Price TBA
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3.17.12
Crossroads
Ypsilanti, MI
W/ Taozins
MORE TBA
9:00
$5
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5 day mini-tour in May.
(Dates still in progress)
Cities as followed:
DAY 1: CHICAGO, ILLINOIS
DAY 2 : ANN ARBOR, MICHIGAN
DAY 3: DETROIT, MICHIGAN
DAY 4: CLEVELAND, OHIO
DAY 5: PITTSBURGH, PENNSYLVANIA
A RECORD RELEASE WEEKEND (YPSILANTI, DETROIT) WILL ALSO BE IN THERE SOME TIME IN APRIL.
CONGRATULATIONS TO YOU BOTH, I HOPE SOMEWHERE YOU’RE HAPPY.
IF THERE’S A MORAL TO THIS STORY THEN I WISH YOU’D SHOW ME.
